What would a machine want with a lifetime supply of chocolate?

The stress of essays/exams/life in general is really getting to me right now. It’s having some rather unpleasant effects on my personality. I’m becoming a “bad egg” of Veruca Salt proportions.

This is my list of demands!

A nice holiday (preferably somewhere in Asia or Scandinavia… but I’m not fussy).

Some new headphones.

Doom Patrol Volumes 2-7

Jason Segel/Mark Ruffalo/Hugh Jackman to act as “back-up boyfriend” should my current “primary” boyfriend be unable to fulfil his duties, for whatever reason.

Someone to make dinner for me.

Someone to wash up afterwards.

World Peace.

Cute vegetarian shoes! (Or basically, a non-meat version of the H+M/Swedish Hasbeens collaboration. It’s amazing!)

To finally figure out what to do with my hair.

To live in a house made of falafel.

A neverending gobstopper.

An iPad (I don’t especially want an iPad, but a 21st century Veruca Salt would own at least three).

Change for £1 so I can use the vending machine that requires exact change and get a packet of McCoys.

Some cute, plain American Apparel dresses. to avoid wardrobe crises in the future.

And an end to the headaches that are making me feel like this:

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